Home Sweet Home

We are finally settled into our beautiful new home & we couldn’t be happier.  It has been so fun giving it personal touches and making it “ours.”  Chandler loves it so much that often times we will ask him if he wants to go somewhere, Grandma’s house for instance, & he will say “No.  I stay at Chan Chan’s new house.” 

The people who lived here prior didn’t leave it in the best condition (to say the least) so we have had to put a lot of work into it and there is a lot more still to do but to be honest we are enjoying every minute of it.  It’s so fun to see my husband in his element constructing and designing things, even fixing things.  Seeing Chandler “help” him is even more of a thrill.  It has been a great bonding experience for all of us.

My eyes have really been opened to how blessed we are during this process.  My parents give & give until I think there is nothing more they could possibly do for us and then they give some more.  We are grateful beyond words to them.  My friend Shaunae spent 24 hours painting & our realtor, who happens to be a very good friend, even got in on the action.  My best friend Ashley drove 4 hours strictly to help get our house in order and paint, even when she had a move coming up herself and only had one more weekend to finish packing.  She, her husband, & her Mom were a huge help.  I lost count of all the friends that helped us move.  We could not have done it without them all & we definitely could not have done it in the short amount of trips it took to get everything here thanks to all the trailers & big muscles.  Words don’t even begin to express our gratitude.  Friends & family have already helped to make our home sweet home all the sweeter.

PICTURES TO COME SOON!

And the ugliest is….

Our friend Hunter hosts an annual ugly sweater party in which admittance is $5 or a toy to give to Toys for Tots.  This year he raised close to $300 & about 10 toys to help out a family in need.  Each year, the person wearing the ugliest sweater is awarded the coveted traveling trophy which is itself adorned in an ugly mass of brown fur.  I waited until the last minute to buy an ugly sweater and the thrift shops were sold out so I headed to the dollar store and bought ornaments to make one myself.  Jared borrowed a holiday sweater from my Mom.  I took first-runner up to a man wearing a belly sweater, tights, and a Santa Clause inspired thong.  Like my Mom said, any man brave enough to wear that costume deserved to win.

My proud Mama snapped a bajillion pictures like we were headed to our high school prom

1,2,3….1600 Jelly Beans!

We really should have bought a lottery ticket the night of my hard working husband’s company Christmas party.  Jared entered a raffle and won the exact same tool set he asked Santa for & then about an hour later we won a flat screen TV for guessing the correct amount of jelly beans in a jar!  It was a great night!  And not just because of the freebies, but because we got to spend the evening with some great folks & dine on a fabulous prime rib dinner.

3 teams had plates filled with small bells. They had to race each other around chairs without any bells falling off. Jared helped lead his team to victory.

Nicole, Kelsey, & Melanie… amazing friends.

Our due dates are 4 days apart... the race is on!

Dancing the night away... (ok, truthfully, my pregnant body only lasted until about 10pm but that's late for me nowadays!)

All Hallow’s Eve

I am a bit delayed in getting Halloween pix up because I had to wait on a cable for my camera to arrive but as the adage goes, better late then never!  I took Chandler to Boo @ The Zoo where he got to see the animals & trick or treat to all the different booths.  He had fun but was frozen stiff by the end.  Even after I bundled him up in his heavy winter coat, covering his Batman costume.  That’s Halloween in Idaho for ya.  Halloween night Jared, my parents, & about 30 friends attended the Qwahitas concert at the Brownstone restaurant.  As usual, they were amazing & we had a great time.  Jared & I dressed as punk rockers & my parents were oh so boring and came dressed in normal attire but we were just glad to have them there.  I don’t think my Mom & I had spent a Halloween together since I was probably about 11.  It’s nights like this that I am thankful to have such a fantastic, fun, & talented group of friends!

Update On My Friend & Her Heavy Battle

I wanted to let you all know that my dear friend with the eating disorder took a courageous, bold step & entered into an inpatient eating disorder facility in a nearby state.  She will be there for up to half a year getting treatment and improving her health.  The pain & fear she is going through right now is difficult but she is handling things well & is excited about taking a new step toward recovery each day that she is there.  I am so proud of her.

I would also like to thank each of you who contacted me personally about your own struggles with ED.  My heart is saddened & overwhelmed that so many of you are dealing with this.  Women that I would have never imagined in a million years are fighting this battle.  It just goes to show, ED does not discriminate.  Rich, poor, old, young, it makes no difference.  Thank you for being so candid in your stories and trusting me enough to spill your hearts.  Each of you are in my prayers daily.  Please feel free to contact me anytime if I can help you in any way. 

Wishing all of you love, health, & contentment!

 

Knocked Up!

Hey ya’ll,

After much praying & getting feedback from you guys, as well as doing some studying, I decided against taking Lupron.  However, I made an appointment to start other fertility drugs this Thursday.  I am thrilled to say though, that won’t be necessary!  I took 2 pregnancy tests last night & both said “Way to go Jared!  You did it!”  Ok, really, they just gave me 2 pink lines but it’s basically the same thing, right?  Hip hip hooray!  I cannot even begin to express our excitement & joy.  Whomever said the power of prayer doesn’t work needs some serious prayers said for them!  What are the odds, we would go through everything we’ve been through & two days before I am to start fertility meds, we would find out there is a bun in the oven?  God is so great you guys!  Last month the doctor was telling me my odds were at 50% and decreasing therefore I need to be put into early menopause, and this month I am pregnant.  I am in love with the circumstances in my life right now.  I appreciate this gift so much more given everything we have been through.  It is still a waiting game given our miscarriage history but we are remaining hopeful and optimistic.  Please keep us in your prayers while we soar through the first trimester.  Love to you all!

Lupron & Endometriosis

I’m writing this post with the hopes that I can get some advice so even if you are a visitor to my blog, please feel free to leave me a comment.  Every word is appreciated.

As most of you know I had surgery 6 months ago to remove endometriosis.  It has now been a full year of trying to conceive since our miscarriage with no luck.  My doctor asked me to come back in yesterday & has said my only option is to be put into menopause for 6 months with a drug called Lupron.  It consists of monthly injections & a whirlwind of side effects, as you can imagine while forcing my body to grow through “the change.”  It will temporarily disolve what is left of the endometriosis & after 6 months the hope is we’ll start with a clean palate & be able to conceive.  My endo is more severe than I had originally understood.  My doctor said that after every cycle I am decreasing my chances of ever becoming pregnant.  Right now I am 50% less likely to get pregnant than I was a year ago.  Therefore, if I wait another year without treatment who knows what my odds will be.  However, something in my gut is telling me this Lupron isn’t the answer for me.  And maybe that’s just because it scares me (especially after the horror stories I read online about it causing permanent menopause in your 20’s) or maybe it’s something more.  All I know is when I have gone against my gut in the past, I later regret it.

If anyone has thoughts, suggestions, or personal testimonies, please please please let me know.  There are a few endomitriosis specialists out there in other states who cut the endo out permanently rather than burn it off.  From my understanding it is extremely expensive though & hard to get insurance companies to pay for it.  I have horrible insurance for myself which makes me extra nervous.

Sorry my past 2 post have been nothing short of depressing.  Sometimes when life sends pain & trials all it once, it’s easiest to type them up & get it off the brain so that I can move on to focusing on all the great blessings in my life like my one in a million husband & my little angel Chandler.  Thanks for taking the time to read them & I promise to get some happier stuff on here soon!  I love you all!

Think Unrealistic Ads Don’t Affect Young Girls? Think Again.

I have an amazing friend.  She is smart, funny, loving, & so much fun to be around.  We met nearly 10 years ago & instantly bonded.  My first thought upon seeing her was “WOW! That girl is stunning!”  She is loyal to her core & beautiful beyond words.  These are the characteristics I see when I look into my friend’s big, beautiful, brown eyes.  However, I see something more.  I see pain & fear.  Regret & exhaustion.  Despair & anguish.  Confusion & sadness.  For inside of her lives a great demon.  A dictator, if you will, always putting her down, telling her she’s not good enough, blinding her from seeing her true beauty that is so obvious to the rest of the world.  It is a man’s voice & he uses food to control her.  Her worth is based on how many calories she has consumed that day.  He does not allow her to fulfill her own emotional needs but forces her to be the ultimate people pleaser.  We call him ED.  ED is like that domestic abuser the abusee just won’t leave.  I hate ED.  I hate him for slowly taking my friend’s life .  I hate him for the years I personally spent shackled & chained to him.  I love that I was eventually able to break free but I hate that my friend has not.  After years of struggling, she is losing her battle.  ED is killing her.  It started with her spirit & now I fear he will take the rest of her.  A heart specialist was called in to deal with her cardiovascular issues.  Her own body has begun to eat away at her brain as the last source of nutrition it can find.  I can see my friend slowly disappearing both physically & mentally.  A nurse recently told her that even her breath carries the scent of a body shutting down.  Unless something changes, she could quite soon be leaving behind a 4-year-old child, parents who love her dearly, & friends who would do anything for her.  I know all too well the thoughts she is having.  The pain, guilt, & embarrassment she is overcome with.  I also know the strength it takes to climb a mountain of hope on a rope of faith & what it’s like to throw those burdens, along with ED, off the side of that mountain once you reach the top.  I just wish there were a way to get her to see that spectacular view.  She’s sees it’s possible based on my own recovery, the challenge is getting her to see herself in that position of health.  She is a Christian & has been so brave in getting help from our assistant pastor, even in the middle of the night which is a huge step for a people pleaser.  I am so proud of her for the steps she has taken, she just needs the courage to take more.  She was on her way to an eating disorder facility last week after an intervention but lost the courage and came home.  For someone who has never been through this, it’s easy to judge & say “that was stupid!”  Let me tell you this, it is one of the most terrifying experiences, to this day, that I have ever been through.  The control an eating disorder has over a mind is incomprehensible unless you have experienced it.  It is hell on earth & yet somehow, when you struggle with it, life on earth without it seems like hell.  It’s a horrible vicious cycle.  So don’t judge.  Just pray.  Please pray for my hurting friend.  Please pray for her health & for a positive attitude that is strong & courageous & willing to do all it takes to win this battle.  There is light at the end of the tunnel baby girl.  Grab hold of the slightest glimpse & go after it without looking back.  You are so much more than this nasty disease.  It does not define you!  You were made in God’s beautiful image & that is the only voice you need to listen to.

Below, is the website for Dove.  They have a foundation dedicated to the self-esteem of young girls.  Please check out the videos if you have a young daughter, granddaughter, sister, niece, or if you have self esteem issues of your own.  Adolesance is when the spiraling decent begins.  You talk to your kids about smoking, drinking, drugs, sex, etc… why not talk to them about this too?  Eating disorders & suicide are the leading cause of death in teenage girls & young women.  The LEADING cause.  It’s no longer a taboo subject.  If you don’t talk to them, someone else will & it may not be in a negative context.  It’s the new peer pressure.

www.campaignforrealbeauty.ca  – click on “a dove film” at the top & you will be directed to the list of videos.  They are powerful.

ALSO, if you want a better visual understanding of what goes on inside someones mind when they have an addiction Kayla & Kupono from So You Think You Can Dance, Season 5, did a POWERFUL piece where Kupono is the addiction & Kayla is trying to break free.  It is the most powerful lyrical dance number I have ever witnessed.  Just google “So you think you can dance kayla & kupono addiction” & you can watch it on youtube.  (Thank you Breclyn for telling me about this.  It is AWESOME!)

Into The Sunset

At an hour when I should be sleeping I can’t help but journal.  Tonight marks the first night of no longer sleeping at “our home”. (If you don’t know, we sold our house & are purchasing another but have to stay with my folks until that home is vacated.)  Up until this point I have been nothing but excited to move.  The house we are moving into is over double the size of the one we are in now, it’s in a much nicer neighborhood, & has a central location which makes commuting to just about anywhere in town, quick & easy.  So why, all of a sudden, am I struck with bittersweet emotion?  I can’t help but feel a tinge of sadness.  It’s in my tiny little house that I watched a newborn turn into a toddler.  It’s in that home that my then, boyfriend Jared, & I shared our first magical kiss & proclaimed our deepest, most intimate feelings for one another.  It’s in that home that I was so deeply comforted in the arms of God on numerous, memorable occasions.  It’s there that I met the perfect neighbors in every sense of the word.  We love you Bonnie & Ted!  It’s in that home that my wonderful friends ripped up pink carpet & turned my spare bedroom into the most adorable little boy’s nursery imaginable.  It’s in that very home that Jared & I celebrated the night of our engagement & spent hours upon hours planning our wedding.  I could go on & on with the memories that have accumulated over the past 3 years.  Everything about our cute little house is personalized from the paint to the flower bed.  It screams ”Jared, Shannon, & Chandler!”  Yet, here we are abandoning this structure that we call our home.  Don’t get me wrong, I am ecstatic over our new house but our quaint little home on Sunset Drive will always have a piece of my heart & hold memories that will never be forgotten.

Better Than Sex Recipes:

I recently went to a Mary Kay party & the hostess, Susan, made the most delicious Margarita’s I’ve ever tasted.   My husband even loved it!  This is substantial because he is a “Margarita Snob” & even has a Margarita named after him at The Cellar Restaurant that he invented.  So, if he likes it, it’s passed the ultimate critic test.  Here is the recipe, courtesy of Susan:

• 1 can Limeade
• 1/2 can Triple Sec
• 1 can Tequila
• 1 Beer (the brand makes no difference.  In Susan’s words “Just use whatever you have left over from camping.”)
• Cover the rim of glass in Margarita salt & pour over ice

The beer makes it frothy & the Limeade makes it delicious!  Store leftovers in your freezer.  Due to the alcohol it will not freeze but rather turn into a refreshing slushy. 

Next is one of my all time favorites but tonight was the first time I have ever attempted to make it myself.  (We all know I’m not much of a cook.)  It’s called “Better Than Sex Cake.”  Whether or not the title suits it is a matter of opinion but rest assured it is up for debate!  It’s THAT yummy!

• Bake a German chocolate cake per instructions on box.
• While cake is still warm, poke a bunch of holes in it with the handle of a wooden spoon.
• Drizzle a can of sweetened condensed milk over it and let it absorb.
• Then drizzle a jar of Carmel ice cream topping and let it soak in.
• Cool completely and frost with 8 oz. of cool whip.
• Crush up 4 or 5 Heath candy bars and sprinkle on it.

Everyone in your household will be thanking you, especially your own taste-buds!

Have a safe & fun Labor Day tomorrow everyone!